Civil War

Heaven doesn’t want me
I’m not courageous enough to die
And yet I have these wings
That are longing so to fly
So if you happen to know me
Love me but let me go
My soul needs to be released
Even though you may not know
These pills make me want to vomit
It’s a battle to the end
Please pray I find a way
For this soul to transcend

Iris

I live in a world others can’t see
In their world there’s no room for me
I live with Gods and spirits, angels too
They always have work for me to do
And now I’m asked to guide you home
The life that ends might be my own
But that’s okay, I am prepared
If that’s the way, then I’m not scared
I am the light, the love, the way
I am Me at the end of the day

Eternal Mystery

Two versions of my life
Were told to me and to you
My ears were filled with lies
While yours heard what was true
But it’s pointless asking why
Or seeking the answers I crave
Because the teller chose to die
And took his reasons to the grave

Hold My Hand

At the end, did you consider
The legacy you left behind?
Did you see the trail of destruction,
The carnage, the slaughter?
And tell me please, right at the end,
Did you think about your daughter?
All of these things are crossing my mind,
While I’m begging you to show me
How to leave it all behind.
You achieved the dream I seek,
The one I’ve yearned for all my life.
To date I have been far too weak,
And too busy causing strife,
But today is the day it seems right.
There is no care to hold me back,
No barrier to implementing the plan.
All I ask is that you hold my hand,
And help me cross to the unknown land.

Almost Time

The last of the secrets revealed
Shows the only part left unhealed
And today of all days, how ironic
Now I am craving a death tonic
Not just for metaphysical death
What I crave is more permanent rest

Incandescent Dream

That was unexpected
To see your name right there
When I know you have gone
To be in Heaven, or somewhere
So, I know this isn’t you
Writing on my screen
But memories flash so vivid
Like an incandescent dream

Last Days

I know I’m not much comfort
To your heart that’s in such pain
But I hope you get the most
Out of the days that remain
Fill your heart and mind
With memories while you can
For the end isn’t really something
For which any of us can plan
May the love of your family
Embrace you at the end
And please remember always
That I am still your friend
I know your heart is breaking
And it’s hard to stay alive
But somehow you’ll get through this
I know you will survive
So fill the days with laughter
Even though soaked in tears
Make memory after memory
That will last throughout the years

Flat Spin

I think it might be a flat spin
Totally out of control
Can’t rein these thoughts in

Frayed Lifeline

Hanging on by a thread
To the voice that says live
When the rest scream so loud
To get the fuck out
Put an end to never being enough
To being worthless and stupid
And to the destructive cyclone I am

Shaky Image

The reflection in the mirror
Retracts and distorts
Making me suspect
It might be frightened
By these thoughts